Pre-and-post euthanasia support, and planned euthanasia

“I just want her to slip away quietly in her sleep”.

“What! Put a date in the diary for the vet to put him to sleep? And know that it was looming there? I couldn’t do that. I couldn’t bear it”.

“it was the best thing we could have done for him, and for us as a family. We discussed it among ourselves, and with the vet, who said we could cancel or change the appointment at any time. She was great, very kind, and really understanding. We were all able to be there, to say goodbye properly. We sat on the floor with him, he was on his blanket. We fed him Primula cheese spread and bacon and told him how much we loved him. We were very sad when the vet gave the injection, but we knew he wasn’t in pain any more”.

So many emotions can arise when a beloved pet is reaching the end of his or her life. Differences of beliefs, opinions, and coping strategies between couples and within families, can emerge/explode as heart-rending conflict and distress.

Clients come to me to discuss and explore how they’re feeling, and how best to cope with family members who express different points of view. Increasingly, I work with clients *before* their beloved pet is put to sleep.

Discussions can range from “What do we say to the kids?” to how dogs (in particular) can really rally in the days before a planned (or non-planned) euthanasia. That rallying can disrupt what a client has had imagined, or how they’ve visualised their pet’s last few days.

Something that often comes up is how a beloved animal’s death can ‘set owners free’ in order to move house/change jobs/travel. This can be devastating, and loaded with feelings of guilt at the time, yet can change as time and discussion brings perspective. It’s an area I want to find out more about.

With large animals, such as horses, a planned euthanasia is often the clear course of action, as there are several professionals involved.

Does it make things easier? Pre-euthanasia discussions can enable clients to approach the event with a clearer mind, which in turn can make it easier for them to take care of their breaking hearts.

And, of course, I am here for clients post-euthanasia, to accompany and support them through any combination of grief, guilt, rage, anguish, desolation, and so much more.

Here are my two, out of sight, but always in my heart. They’re likely to be romping on a heavenly beach, or sleeping upside down on a heavenly sofa.